Just In #2
Investigation, Not Therapy #1
Constant Happiness (It's Everywhere)
Bliss And Thoughts
How Does Identification Drop Away ?
The Ocean of Samsara
Enquiring Into The Fear
The Light Of Looking
If a mood, a sensation, is present in the body, why not just accept right now that this sensation is just present in the body ? Let it be, this is ok. This is the best attitude, and it will go by itself. If you start to struggle, this is how you perpetuate this state.
Find out who is really afraid and of what, and experience. Call up this confrontation inside yourself, observe it and see what happens, what's going on internaly. Watch the reactions and emotions in the body, and see who suffers them.
In Satsang, something is touched deeply, and some trust comes, you sense that there's a chance here to go. It may not be even deliberate or so conscious, but it comes up automaticaly. All that is suppressed is coming up when the fragrance of truth is smelt, so it comes up to the surface. And you have to be with a master, you have to be with someone who's awake. Because they know all the different ways the mind can work. And they will remind you : don't panic, this is only the effects of a kind of detox which is going on, emotional and psychic detox, all your stuff is going out. Don't do any work on them. Now all you have to do is keep quiet, switch off from your involvement as much as possible, observe them happening, but don't try to manipulate. They will come, they are passing out.
Such is the nature of all thoughts and sensations, they come and go. Your previous problems seemed equally as pressing and important in their time as your current problem now does, but they are no more, absent from the present by the force of nature. If such is the nature of thoughts and feelings, surely your present difficulties share the same destiny. Why worry about it ? All these movements are witnessed in you and by you as pure awareness. Stay as That !
Some things, you have to get used to. That potential was dormant inside, and that story flicked it up, brought it up. It's good, better out than in. So for a while now, it's trigged, this mood is present, and it's also possible to allow some mood or some past pain to come up without loosing your peace. Often we think that the two are not compatible, that they cannot sit in the same chair, but there is ample room in the infinity of being for every expression to have its play, and then to exhaust its expression and go back into silence. If a mood, a sensation, is present in the body, why not just accept right now that this sensation is just present in the body ? Let it be, this is ok. This is the best attitude, and it will go by itself. If you start to struggle, this is how you perpetuate this state. Anything can come.
Witness what is taking place. Even to say "I must tolerate...", no, witnessing does not "tolerate" states. Witnessing is not judging, is not personal, doesn't have prefered states. When you know that, then your environment, your garden is always green, no problem. You don't say : some feelings are welcome, others not. You don't need any bodyguard for this beingness, anything can manifest. And because of this attitude, things that need to happen, like those feelings, they blow through very quickly, and they don't leave any footprints in the consciousness. If you struggle, you judge, then you leave some registration of that in memory ("I don't want to have this feeling again").
That is anticipation. It will feel how it feels. A feeling like what you imagine may come, but that is not a requirement, it is not a condition. This is prior to everything. No quality can convey, no sensation, no feeling.
some feelings (may arise), let these feelings come, let them be felt, energeticaly, the presence of them, feel them, but keep your eyes open, and just watch, who suffers, who suffers it, open question, see if anyone is found who's a sufferer of this projection of this fear.
And the play, the feeling of identification, may arise, but it will be momentary, it will be fickle, it will not linger, it will come and go. Don't mind that these feelings come, and go. You don't have to police your feelings, just remain neutral. That neutrality is naturaly there. Don't say "Oh, I don't want to feel this !", don't choose the feelings, remain as that unassociated presence, the feeling "I Am". Get used to it. And this is the simplest exercice, if you want to call it like that. I'm pointing only to something which is naturaly with you.
It's as though the beingness is burpimg out or vomiting of some old stuff that has to come out. And it's not pleasant. Many people they are trying to avoid these type of feelings. In any sort of spiritual practice or discipline, if your practice or work is good, it will trigger all this back-clash, you used this word, it will stir up all these feelings that will come up to the surface, and you'll need one who's strong, who can remind you : don't panic, don't rush about, don't give up, don't turn back, stay put, this is Grace already acting on this, just giving up all this, all these that were giving you that sens of block inside you, it's coming out.
There's a fear somehow to see it. Who is suffering this ? Let the feelings arise, pulse, happens, and hold the question, like you've never asked this question before, don't be an expert at this question, "who is suffering this ?" and be quiet, and hold this question in your silence.
Vigilance means watchfulness. When you speak of vigilance, the only meaning I can give it is to watch this tendancy to go with the mind flow, and to get caught up into thinking and identifying with what is arising as thoughts, feelings, memory and so on.